It does not seem easy for everyone to reconcile being human and being a Christian. For some, there is such a thing as two identities that contradict each other. In the attempt to link the two identities, it can sometimes come to an identity crisis. This is perhaps most likely a relationship problem. We are in a relationship with our humanity, as well as with our Christianity. The first is the result of our birth, the second is the result of our new creation in Christ (2 Cor. 5:17).
I am human, I am Christian
However, there is an area of tension, which wants to be mentioned here right at the beginning. So one says: “Now that I’m in a relationship, I have problems that I didn’t have when I was on my own.” And as a Christian, experience is added: “Now that I am living in a relationship with Christ, I am faced with choices that I had no idea about when I was walking without Christ.” It can happen that we feel trapped – for example between moral concepts on the one hand and hormones on the other, or between the opinions of others and our very own urge to live. Should my being human now be in conflict with my being a Christian? Such a tension is felt by many. I myself feel it again and again and in many conversations I learned the same from others.
Sometimes this tension arises out of the Christian culture, which is where we come from. Ed Young writes, especially on sexuality, that we are “never quite sure how our spontaneous, uncensored sexual urges fit into the fabric of Christian morality.” we are “never quite sure how our spontaneous, uncensored sexual urges fit into the fabric of Christian morality” (Ed Young, “Pure Sex,”). That would be depressing if no answers were found to this.
Some people try to avoid this tension. The extremes are called lawlessness and legalism. One throws every norm overboard, the other is super-pious in disguise. However, both are not free. Liberated Christianity may also include liberated humanity. The relationship with Christ can and should fertilize our lives. This attitude towards life is neither lawless nor legal, but life-affirming in every respect. Ideally, our humanity is sustained by our Christianity – and vice versa, because living faith is also an expression of true life. If we experience this as a field of tension, then we are obviously not free.
The encounter of reality
But how does that work? The tension between internal and external influences raises questions. If we respond to them – if we “encounter” these questions, so to speak – then we will find our way to decisions. To decide consciously means that we live and give direction to our lives. That is reality. There lies the hope and vitality of freedom.
Every dispute is relationship work. It does not matter whether this concerns the relationship with ourselves, with our fellow human beings, our life partner and spouse, or even the relationship with God. In jeder Beziehung und in jeder Hinsicht können wir stets nur uns selbst einbringen. Martin Buber said about relationships: “The free man is the one who wants without arbitrariness. He believes in reality; that is, he believes in the real connectedness of the real two-ness I and Thou. He believes in the destiny and in the fact that it needs him” (Martin Buber, Ich und Du). The free man is the man who believes that it needs him in the relationship. Therefore, there is no growth and freedom without connectedness, without relationship. It needs both decisions and commitment, but not in a delimiting sense, but as a relational reality. Commitment as connectedness. Freedom reveals itself precisely out of the relationship.
Freedom lived
True relationship recognizes true I and true you, sees between two persons no demarcation, but jointly experienced reality. In this kind of encounter there is no default, no expectation, no appropriation and no foreign determination. True “I” and true “you” are both free, although they (also) relate to each other. Freedom arises out of the relationship. Real freedom comes from God’s affirmation of us and our voluntary turning to God through Christ. When we are called into a relationship with Him by God’s grace, here is the true God facing our true self. This experience fills the world and makes it free.
Those who are loved can love others. Those who are liberated can liberate others. He can act out of this freedom. We are now called to freedom, as Paul testifies, “For you have been called to freedom, brothers. Only do not use freedom as an occasion for the flesh, but serve one another through love!” (Gal 5:13). Freedom does not appear to be the ultimate goal here. It is not liberation “from” but liberation “to” service in love. This is how liberated life emerges in our encounters and relationships (cf. Gal 5:6).
Being human and being Christian – they can only be lived. They can only be lived in relationship. Only true relationship leads to true freedom. True freedom introduces each next encounter to the same freedom and love and serves through the same values.
